its getting colder!

Hello again from Boston! We've been checking the weather and hope that you all are surviving the negative temperatures back home. Relatively speaking, its not AS cold here but today it dropped below 20 while we were out and about so, needless to say my feet are happy that I am inside writing this!
We've gotten into sort of a routine here at CASPAR, its becoming much like home, and the shelter and the city are going to be hard to leave in 2 and a half days! The last few days, for me, have been spent preparing and serving the meals for the folks here, and relaxing in our room as well. Each day my insight into the lifestyles of these people grows larger and larger, and I am very grateful for everything that I can take in. One of the main, most important things I've learned here is just that; homelessness is a lifestyle. Every homeless person is not the same, some are addicts (like the ones we are interacting with), some are mentally disabled, some are both, some are neither. There is not one specific cause of homelessness, but rather it seems to me that each of these individuals have had a combination of things happen to them that causes their state. Drugs and alcohol only further the snow-ball affect of your life falling apart, that leads to homelessness. For some it is frustrating to look at those who DO have money (SS, Disability, trust funds, etc), and who are addicted to drugs/alcohol and CAN become clean, and wonder why they don't?? It is because this is their lifestyle, it is the closest thing they have to comfort. Someone who is out of their mind with despair, loneliness, and an out of control addiction, can be warm and fed in a shelter, without stopping feeding their addictions. Just like being a college student, a soccer mom, or a corporate CEO, are all very different, unique ways of life, I've come to learn that homelessness is also. Despite the fact that physical addiction in itself is the hardest thing to overcome, giving up the lifestyle that (although it may not be ideal) you are familiar and comfortable with, is not something people will necessarily jump at the chance to do. I make sure to keep that in mind as I talk to different residents here and hear their stories. Last night I talked to Mary (28 yrs) and Peter (27yrs) , two of the youngest regulars here, for quite some time. They both were/are IV drug users who are back and forth with contemplation of sobriety. Mary's story is an example of how plain & simple bad luck can land you homeless, hungry, and substance-addicted. Long story short, she grew up in a rough household with siblings who were users (two of them have recently died of overdoses), and a mother who had no patience for her. Mary was in college, going for psychology, and got addicted to Oxycontins. The OC's led to stronger, more dangerous drugs, and lead her to the life she leads now. She has two young children who her mother has court ordered her not to be able to see (or talk to), and is trying to get sober so she can have visitation for her kids. She is also an example of how MOST homeless are dual-diagnoses; mental problems as well as drug problems. She's on all kinds of anti-psychotic, anti-anxiety, depression meds. The combination of the depression/anxiety, meds, worries about her children, keeps her on a path of drug seeking behavior. I could tell that she wants SO BAD to get out of it, but there is no support for her, and someone as unstable as she is is not going to be able to do it on her own. It really really REALLY shows me how important this kind of work is....
I was never a judgemental person to begin with, but when I go back into my normal semester routine in Madison, I am going to see homeless people in a COMPLETELY different light. I never was one to give them money, because I knew most were users. I will still stick to that, but, like Shuchi said, I'm going to see past the plastic cup and the cat-calls and remember the people in this shelter, and their stories, and their hopes for the future, and I'm going to make sure that I treat them all as human beings. I really am going to miss this place so much when we leave! I love knowing the residents on a name-to-name basis, knowing where they "hang out", their stories, etc. I am also going to miss BOSTON in general...I am officially in love with this city. Two nights ago we went to a hookah bar right near the shelter (when someone told Stevie (the Outreach guy) about the hookah bar, he thought we said HOOKER BAR. Obviously hookah is a new fad...!) Then we took the subway (which in itself was awesome, I didnt want to seem like a cheesy tourist because the Bostonians are definately used to subways, but I'd only seen subways in movies/TV!) to North Station, and got off right across from the Garden (the arena where the Celtics play). We took a look in the Garden, and then headed out with the crowd leaving the Celtics game. We found our way to a Litte Italy of sorts...probably was much cuter during the day but walking down dark, cobblestone, narrow streets at night was semi-sketch...but we made it! And found a cute bakery with yummy canolis & other desserts. Then today we took the bus to Harvard Square, which is basically the equivalent of State Street for Harvard. Lots of shops & restaurants. Harvard is BEAUTIFUL...makes me wish I was smarter!! (Kidding! I love Madison!) We found the Common area of Harvard Law School (the equivalent of our Memorial Union/Rathskeller). It was veeery fancy....as nice as it was, it made me realize how much I love the broken in wooden chairs and pitchers of beer at our Union! We also got icecream at J.P. Licks, a Boston-area icecream place that we've been told to try.
Its almost time for dinner....as much as we all keep throwing around ideas of going out to eat, the food at the shelter is surprisingly good!! We all have to help out serving the meal, and usually end up eating it too...plans for take-out dinner have been continuously falling through :) But it also is really rewarding to continue getting to know everyone at the shelter. Friday we have the entire day free so we will most likely do a nice, sit down, group dinner, as a last hoorah before we head back to the WI.

BYE!

Brit